Is your ass covered?

20 Jan

This is going to be a little different from my normal posts, but I have to get something out there, in hopes that maybe it will serve as a revelation for some poor soul.

I’ll preface this by saying that maybe I’m a little bitter because I am lacking in the posterior and have trouble filling most pants without the help of a belt. Even the “pants” that aren’t pants are baggy on me.

The “pants” that aren’t pants?

OH! You mean leggings!

Yes, my friends. I know you’ve all heard it before in some shape or form, and forgive me if I sound like a broken record…but

LEGGINGS

ARE

NOT

PANTS

Maybe it’s just especially irking me right now because it’s winter and I feel like I see leggings more now because it’s cold and people just want to throw on whatever and blah blah blah. But, honestly? Most leggings aren’t that warm.

poor JLH...her bum must be so cold

And they give innocent people access to views they didn’t necessarily ask to see. I won’t post another example, but it rhymes with schmamelschmoe. Yeah, I’ll spare you.

It’s not that difficult to reach for a pair of jeans or regular sweatpants when you’re getting ready, and, if you’ve got a little extra baggage, you won’t look like jelly spilling over the edges of the jar. They’re just as if not more comfortable, and they give your limbs (and other parts) a little more breathing room. Ahhh…

Leggings aren’t completely useless, though. In fact, there are three (3) instances in which they are 100% acceptable.

  1. Worn under (regular) pants as an extra layer when it’s cold. A form of long underwear, if you will. This is my favorite use for them at the moment.
  2. Worn under a shirt/tunic/dress that covers your badonk. And then some, for good measure.
  3. Okay, leggings can be worn as pants even if your ass isn’t covered. In the privacy of your own home. Going out in public with only a thin layer of spandex covering the essentials is basically equivalent to being an exhibitionist, which is frowned upon in most parts of the United States and outlying territories. If you feel the urge to wear them as pants, just don’t leave the house. Simple as that.

Now that you’ve heard my side, I want to hear yours. Are leggings acceptable as pants in public? Why or why not?

I will return to normal posts…sometime within the next few days. I’m not that predictable.

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2 Responses to “Is your ass covered?”

  1. Jaden 01/21/2010 at 2:59 am #

    AMEN SISTER.

    You have hit every concern I have with leggings and more. In the privacy of your own home & under the safety of a tunic or short dress, leggings are a godsend. Worn i n replacement of jeans? Not so much.

    I HATE PANTS, we all know this… but hating pants is not an excuse to put an even tighter form of bottoms on.

    Love, Your Loyal Reader

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. A post I never thought I’d write « Impatient and hungry - 05/11/2010

    […] BUT! I was in the semi-privacy of my own home and my ass was covered. I feel like I made such a big deal about it that I had to let you all know. That is […]

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